Your Dad Wasn’t a Metrosexual: But His Best Buddy Was

cc metrosexual Your Dad Wasnt a Metrosexual: But His Best Buddy Was

Mmmmm. Ret­ro­sex­ual mas­culin­ity. Served in a rocks glass. Effort­less. Unself­con­scious. Dated.

It tastes just like your… dad.

Unlike you, of course. You mois­tur­ize. Go to the gym. Watch what you eat. Fret about whether you’re wor­thy of love. Worry about what mas­culin­ity actu­ally means. And taste of tea-tree oil and lavender.

If only we could bring those days back! When you could oper­ate heavy machin­ery and speed­boats pissed out of your mind. When no one thought you might be homo. When the only mag­a­zines you bought were Pop­u­lar Mechan­ics and Pent­house. When women couldn’t keep their hands off you even though you had no dress sense, smelt bad and your hair was full of lard.

And when toned, top­less, tweak­ing 1970s hus­tlers checked them­selves out in rest room mir­rors while wait­ing for their next mar­ried punter. (Yes, that pic­ture caught my eye too.)

Canadan Club: for the the man who, like most men today, is on the out­side look­ing in. Aching to be sold back by adver­tis­ing the very thing that adver­tis­ing has deprived him of. How many of the men read­ing this ad today even speak to their dad, or know what he drinks?

As I have pointed out before, it’s a mea­sure of how self-conscious and medi­ated mas­culin­ity is now that ‘real guys’ what­ever they were are now just another annoy­ing fad. Faux retro.

On the rocks.

Tip: Fresca Davis

11 Comments

  • […] may remem­ber I couldn’t resist pok­ing fun a while back at Cana­dian Club’s ‘Your Dad Wasn’t A Met­ro­sex­ual’ poster, the one with with the tag line ‘Damn Right Your Dad Drank It’.  It turns out […]

  • […] to link me to her post on the cam­paign, as well as Mark Simpson’s take on the use of the word met­ro­sex­ual. posted by michelle at 7:55 pm […]

  • Repub­li­can­ism is enough to drive any­one to drink. Even to Canada.

  • Mark, I meant to con­tact you back when I first saw this ad.

    Back when Bertie, then POW, was tour­ing the US in 20’s, your one-time king-for-ten months com­posed the fol­low­ing doggerel:

    Four and twenty Yan­kees feel­ing mighty dry
    went across the bor­der to get a drink of rye!
    When the rye was open the Yanks began to sing
    “God bless Amer­ica, but God Save the King!”

    I’m a Crown Royal man myself :)

  • I don’t think it’s irrel­e­vant — CC are try­ing to make a virtue out of their rub­bish­ness, at the same time as try­ing to depict them­selves as styl­ishly anti-stylish.

    I do it all the time.

  • It may be irrel­e­vant, but can i just point out that Cana­dian Club is actu­ally a pretty rub­bish whisky?

  • I see these ads all over Toronto and love ‘em.

    Soon to be released:

    Your mother wore sun­glasses occa­tion­ally for a rea­son — - — Danm right your dad drank it!”

  • P Coderch wrote:

    Good point, Mr.Simpson. My dad is 65 and he recently ran his 27th marathon. Dur­ing his youth, he served as a mil­i­tary aid in Viet­nam, and he fought in the 1980s in Mozam­bique as liutenant-colonel in the U.N peace troops. He smokes thick cig­ars, drinks whiskey on the rocks, and grew up in a World where boys weared pants and girls weared skirts adn there was no gen­der con­fu­sion what­so­ever. Dads over age 55 are the last real men left. When the last one of them dies, all there will be left are women and pseudo-males. Freud did say once that dads are the ulti­mate fig­ures of mas­culin­ity, and he was right.

  • Thought you’d like that–you sure did it jus­tice.
    (What did Capt. Kirk taste of?)

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