Category Archives: metrosexual

I’d F*ck Me: Mirror Man-Love

 WARNING: hipsters and gay bears may want to watch this ad backwards. I’m rather taken with this refreshingly direct ad currently airing on MTV for a Philips Norelco product that promises to ‘shave, style and groom’. And also you’d be forgiven for thinking, suck your cock. A young man approaches the mirror, face and chest hidden …

April 24, 2013 – 3:40 pm | By Mark Simpson | Posted in advertising, metrosexual | Tagged , , , , , , | Comments (2)

Use Our Straight Acting Cosmetics — Or Everyone Will Know You’re a Drag Queen

A well-executed, very funny Brazilian ad from Ogilvy & Mather for Dove Men + Care shampoo that is bound to go viral (translated here). And ads that send up the absurdity of other ads often are very funny. But when an ad does, the absurdity that it’s usually frantically trying to distract you from its own. …

March 21, 2013 – 1:16 pm | By Mark Simpson | Posted in advertising, metrosexual, retrosexual | Tagged , , , , , | Comments (4)

David Bowie’s Bisensuality

The DNA test results are in. And I can exclusively reveal that the real the metrosexual’s real daddy is… David Robert Jones. Whatever the truth of Bowie’s own sexuality, his early 70s intrusion into the living rooms of suburban England was the most powerful and provocative sexual liberation parade ever seen in the UK. He was later to …

March 11, 2013 – 6:21 pm | By Mark Simpson | Posted in 70s, commentary, journalism, metrosexual | Tagged , , , , , , | Comments (0)

Becks’ Bum: Satisfaction or Disappointment?

I don’t have much to say about the much-discussed latest Beckham ad for his H&M pants, directed by fellow LA-loving Brit Guy Ritchie, in which he runs through Beverly Hills in his white slippers as the props and scenery conspire to remove his clothes, Cupid Stunt–like. Except: Those slippers must be really, really snug to stay on. And: …

February 10, 2013 – 9:07 pm | By Mark Simpson | Posted in advertising, commentary, metrosexual, metrosexy | Tagged , , , , | Comments (2)

Nightmare Balls

Once again, I’m very grateful that American feminists have scientifically proven (by looking at dusty back issues of Rolling Stone magazine) that men aren’t ‘really’ objectified, only women are. Because it means that this eye-popping ad for toilet cleaner featuring a tarty boy band suspended beneath the rim of a toilet in cages, imploring ‘baby’ to …

November 29, 2012 – 1:50 pm | By Mark Simpson | Posted in advertising, metrosexual | Tagged , , | Comments (2)

Mirror Men on Canvas — and in Crocs

The Delhi-based artist Pallavi Singh has been meditating on metrosexuality in the Indian subcontinental context again and has very kindly sent me these rather wonderful new paintings and given me permission to post them here. I think my personal favourite is ‘Rise of Mirror Man’ — I particularly like how his Crocs match his suspenders. Here’s …

November 23, 2012 – 3:34 pm | By Mark Simpson | Posted in art, metrosexual | Tagged , , | Comments (2)

Nail Varnish For Warriors

  Tip: Benjamin D

November 21, 2012 – 11:19 am | By Mark Simpson | Posted in metrosexual | Tagged , , | Comments (0)

It’s Not a Journey: The Endless Trend of Male Vanity

The next time someone tries to convince me that Pitt is ‘a really great actor, actually’ I’ll just throw my eyes around the room in a casually-but-profoundly dramatic fashion before fixing them on the Fight Club fanboy — and it always is a Fight Club fanboy — and saying: “THERE you ARE!” I don’t mean to …

October 21, 2012 – 11:36 pm | By Mark Simpson | Posted in advertising, metrosexual | Tagged , , , | Comments (12)

‘Get Your Filthy Hands Off Me!’ Gorgeous George’s Glamorous Legacy

Rather than watch the Olympics, and all that noble, serious sporting uplift, I’ve been reading a book about a carny, corny, shameless 1940s-50s American wrestler: Gorgeous George: The Outrageous Bad-Boy Wrestler Who Created American Pop Culture, by John Capouya. My American chum Chris Supermarky recommended it to me, thinking it would be of interest. He wasn’t …

August 9, 2012 – 12:37 pm | By Mark Simpson | Posted in commentary, masculinity, metrosexual, popular culture, sport | Tagged , , , , , , , | Comments (5)

Are Modern Men Manly Enough?

Yours truly takes part in a round table heated  debate on masculinity over at The New York Times. (You won’t be surprised to discover that unlike most contributors, I’m intensely relaxed about intensely relaxed modern masculinity.)

July 13, 2012 – 7:53 pm | By Mark Simpson | Posted in metrosexual | Tagged , , , | Comments (2)