Viennese Gag on Big Strudels

Austrian Phaliban Viennese Gag on Big Strudels

A poster cam­paign advert­ising ‘Nude Men’ (“a long over­due exhib­i­tion on the diverse and chan­ging depic­tions of naked men from 1800 to the present”) at the Leopold Museum in Vienna seems to have aroused the pas­sions of the local phalliban.

I thought the Austrians, like the nut-brown Germans I spied on in Corfu when I was on a fam­ily hol­i­day there as a kid, were very laid back about nud­ity. But it seems, like the organ­isers of the exhib­i­tion, I was very much mistaken.

From Time’s news­feed:

We didn’t real­ise that many, many people would be really upset or really angry in a way that we are also afraid about secur­ity, about pro­tec­tion of the vis­it­ors of the museum” explained Klaus Pokorny, a spokes­per­son for the museum, as quoted in Reuters. “Many people told us that they wanted to or had to pro­tect their chil­dren,” he added about the response to the naked advert­ise­ments. “Some had warned that if we won’t cover it they would go there with a brush and they would cover it with color. Already some­body did that.”

The museum has capit­u­lated and agreed to cover up the big stru­dels with red strips of paper - in other words, to deface the images them­selves. Including a fam­ous photo by Pierre & Gilles called Vive la France, which shows three foot­ball play­ers wear­ing socks in blue, white and red and… big grins. (An image which for some reason Time doesn’t repro­duce — so I’ve done so below.)

Vive La France 242x300 Viennese Gag on Big Strudels

We are not really happy about the situ­ation,” said Mr. Pokorny about the changes. “You always hope that we have made pro­gress, that we are now in the 21st century.”

 Tip: David S

Pillars of the community — the Phalliban pops up again


In the latest example of the prudish power of the USA’s rampant Phalliban, out­raged res­id­ents of Kaiser, Oregon, have deman­ded the removal of some newly installed safety pil­lars.

phallic posts Pillars of the community   the Phalliban pops up again

Apparently they are too remin­is­cent of male gen­italia. What a load of bollards.

Although I’m no expert on American pen­ises, I’ve seen a few in my time — and I don’t recall any being made out of four feet of rein­forced con­crete. And I think I would have noticed.

I sus­pect the good women of Kaiser (and it does appear to be women in the report doing the com­plain­ing) are just bragging.

And if you’re talk­ing offens­ively penis-shaped eye­sores, humong­ous 4x4s like the one pic­tured behind the cheeky bol­lard — whose hefty momentum the pil­lars have clearly been designed to pro­tect ped­es­tri­ans from — look much more phal­lic to me.

The city coun­cil, eager to pla­cate the American Phalliban, plans to modify the appear­ance of the pil­lars with metal col­lars and chains. Though why S&M pricks should pass without com­ment where vanilla ones aroused a storm of indig­nant protest is unclear.

If this approach fails, the coun­cil has pledged to remove the pil­lars. Perhaps they should dynam­ite them like the Taliban did with the Buddhas of Banyan.

Surely though the cheapest way to dis­guise the phal­li­cism of pil­lars like this in the US would be to give them fore­skins? Or just make them wear really baggy board shorts?

Tip: Steve Zeeland