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The Size Queenery of Straight Men

Following my previous post about straight male cockwatching, I should point out that some straight blokes are quite open about their size queenery – and in fact keen to shove it down your throat. Particularly drunk soldiers from Liverpool propping up the urinal.

It seems to be part of the licensing requirements of nightclubs in northern UK garrison towns that there always be a drunk, chatty scouse squaddie at the trough. A few months back I went for a slash in such an establishment and sure enough there was a twenty-something drunk chatty scouse squaddie, very happy to be in the men’s bogs, with his penis out surrounded by the smell of piss. This one happened to be unusually tall – I’m 6’2’’ and he towered three or four inches above me.

I joined him at the trough and he started blathering away affably. I smiled and nodded and tried to remember my twelve times table. Then a surprisingly small but very stocky bloke came in. He went to piss in one of the stalls behind us. He didn’t shut the door. A mate of his who’d followed him into the men’s but joined us at the trough pointed at his diminutive back in the stall behind and announced: ‘’e’s only a little man but ‘e’s got a MASSIVE COCK!’

At this the tall scouser’s ears’ pricked up. ‘Ere, c’mon mate!’ he shouted. ‘Show us yer MASSIVE COCK!’

The little big guy, clearly used to and bored with this request, ignored him.

The giant scouser started pleading. ‘Awww, c’mon mate, please! PLEASE show us your MASSIVE COCK!!’

I didn’t know where to look now. So I looked down.

‘Awww, it’s just not fair,’ complained the scouser to me, giving up. ‘’E’s only little and ‘e’s got a MASSIVE COCK and I’m twice as fuckin’ tall and I’ve only got a little un! I WANNA MASSIVE COCK!!’

‘Well,’ I said, shaking my dick carefully, stuffing it back in my pants and winking at him, ‘you can’t have everything can you, mate?’

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