The 'Daddy' of the Metrosexual, the Retrosexual, & spawner of the Spornosexual

Manscaping Manhattan’s Manbits

Simon Doonan at the NY Obsever notices that metrosexuality isn’t dead after all and is busily getting straight men’s legs in the air:

Straight guys need to ditch their new aesthetic preoccupations, stop trying to turn themselves into sleazy porn studs, and go back to being drones and bread-winners. You fellows were the last bastion of self-denying un-vanity, and now look! Between your plucked privates and John Edwards’ $400 haircut, the entire social structure of America has been thrown into a reeling dis-equilibrium. Between the gays and the gals there are enough queens in the hive already. Throw away the Nair, put your Dockers and golf shirts back on, and get back to work.

It is, as Doonan obviously is aware, a forlorn hope. Straight American males have tasted the Royal Jelly and won’t accept Jell-O any more.

Or shit sticking to their man-fur.

Tip: Peter McQuaid