The Trouble With Men

Why can’t gay men grow up? Why can’t they get themselves a nice cat instead of behaving like dirty dogs? Why can’t they listen to Radio Four more instead of trawling the net for sex? Why don’t they get a pipe and slippers instead of thongs and crystal meth? Why can’t they stop being so damn undomesticated and be more… lesbian? And why oh why can’t gays settle down with nice Simon Fanshawe, especially when he’s done so much for them? Surely they could have… Read More »The Trouble With Men

Curiouser & Curiouser: The Strange ‘Disappearance’ Of Male Bisexuality

The recent spate of media reports of the commonness of female bisexuality – and the ‘non-existence’ of the male variety – prompts Mark Simpson to ponder the real, ‘red-blooded’ nature of the ‘bi-curious’ times we’re living in. Male bisexuality doesn’t exist. Or it’s very, very rare. Or it’s really just gay men in denial. Yeah, it’s official: bi guys are freaks and liars as well as non-existent. Female bisexuality, on the other hand, is almost universal. It’s as natural and as true as it is wonderful and real… Read More »Curiouser & Curiouser: The Strange ‘Disappearance’ Of Male Bisexuality

To Their Manor Born

Before the Thames-side inner London boroughs became places of lattes and loft apartments, they were the ancestral domain of the white working class. But as ‘The Likes of Us: a history of the white working class’ points out, it’s not fashionable to acknowledge that. By Mark Simpson (Independent on Sunday, 25 July 2004) Southwark, the deprived south London Borough that gazes across the Thames at the bright lights and easy money of the City and the West End, has a long and proud “previous” when… Read More »To Their Manor Born

Metrosexual war breaks out in Holland

It seems that the metrosexual war has broken out in Holland. But it’s a phoney one. News item translated from Adformatie (Holland’s Campaign) 30 March, 2006: The metrosexual isn’t over The metrosexual is passé, so please make space for the uber-sexual! That’s the message behind the new Bavaria beer campaign, launched publicly today. Men with neat haircuts doing the shopping and the ironing are transformed during the advert into angry Neanderthals running through the woods until they experience their “Bavaria moment” in the pub. “Men have… Read More »Metrosexual war breaks out in Holland