The 'Daddy' of the Metrosexual, the Retrosexual, & spawner of the Spornosexual

Tag: men’s underwear (page 1 of 1)

Oeufs Masculin à La Francaise

http://youtu.be/FfbR_2A-mfk

Apparently, French briefs will turn your ‘oeufs’ into a tasty and nicely-presented h’omelette. Should you be attacked by a smiling, impeccably retro-styled woman with a hammer.

This viral ad for men’s underwear by Le Slip Francais is certainly attention – or rather, nut – grabbing. Particularly in when you compare it to the sexed-up advertising of, say, Armani and CK, appealing as they do to male sensuality and desirability, not to mention open-legged, under-dressed male vulnerability.

But I’m not sure this message will sell many briefs to men who aren’t very heavily into CBT.

Though perhaps the target audience (as my advertising friend Honourable Husband pointed out elsewhere) for this oeuf-hammering is actually women – who are looking for an Xmas present for a male partner.

If so, I would say that the target female buyer is one that feels somewhat ambivalent about their man. 

Whatever this ad for designer castration anxiety’s merits, I think the art direction is delicious. Note how the lamp-shades, the stereo-gram top and the hammer-wielding lady’s nail varnish all match.

It’s the details that matter when you’re making ‘oeufs’ splatter.

h/t Hans Versluys

Calvin Klein Mark(et)s Your Cock

… or at least, your cock as you might wish it to be.  If it was endowed with very good genes, worked out in the gym twice a day and had zero subcutaneous fat.  And was shot in high gain black and white.

But for all the professional production values, these models in the new ‘Mark the Spot’ campaign are nasty.  As in, just stepped off a multi-racial porn gang-bang shoot nasty.  Still covered in… cockiness.

And initially at least it seems as if they’re talking cock as well.

I’m not sure I ‘want to see more’, though.  I’m not especially fond of this ad with it’s in-yer-face arrogance (and it reminds me more than a little of this chap).  But I suspect it’s meant to be as annnoying as… an erection.

Or an internet virus.

Nevertheless, partly because he was the least convincing cock, I did watch pretty-boy Kellan Lutz talking about how much he loves to be in front of the camera in his Calvins (‘they hold everything together’), and tries to convince us that he got his vast, juicy cantaloupe melon pecs from boxing and snowboarding.

Tip: Stephen B

Ultimate Underwear: C-IN2’s Prison Parade

The latest ‘arresting’ ad from hip men’s designer underwear label, C-IN2. Shot by Steven Klein. It’s currently airing on billboards on the streets of Melbourne where kids and nuns and navvies can see it. And why not?

There’s really nothing I can say about this or what it says about contemporary masculinity and metrosexuality that isn’t completely explicit in the ‘captivating’ image itself.

OK, so there’s one thing I have to point out: It seems the model prisoner closest to the camera hasn’t mastered the gay porn star technique of removing your trousers without taking off your boots. Perhaps he spent too long plumping his quiff – or his packet.

No doubt he’s going to be severely punished by the nasty guard with the big machine gun.

Maybe he’ll throw him in the cage and make him do a few rounds of Ultimate Fighting.


PS – I’ve been reliably informed that C-IN2 underwear includes a cock-ring type device designed to push your privates into the public’s face. Men these days are just total hussies. They should be locked up.